Lisa Scottoline and Francesca Serritella once again tickle our funny bones with light-hearted humor and everyday situations in Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat? In a series of essays alternating between mother and daughter, Lisa and Francesca tackle college reunions, remote controls, city living, country dwelling, pet perils and TV religion. They also discuss bad breakups, last goodbyes, new beginnings and growing old.
Sharing their confessions, heartaches, love lives and just ordinary living, the authors remind us not to sweat the small stuff. While the mass media spends millions trying to convince us that we must be thin, smart, sexy, modern, well-read, and perfect in word and deed, Lisa and Francesca give us permission to eat on the beach and enjoy. To love yourself as your parents loved you. To recapture those blissful moments as children when we were free of guilt. To live life as it was meant to be lived — joyfully.
Lisa Scottoline is The New York Times bestselling author of the legal mystery series Rosato and Associates and numerous standalone titles. She is a past president of Mystery Writers of America and is an Edgar Allan Poe Award winner. Lisa co-authors a weekly column for The Philadelphia Inquirer with her daughter, Francesca Serritella, entitled “Chick Wit.” Other humorous collections by these authors include Meet Me at Emotional Baggage Claim, Best Friends, Occasional Enemies and My Nest Isn’t Empty, It Just Has More Closet Space.
Don’t miss out on this book — it’s a gem!
Writer Reki Kawahara and designer abec have experienced unbridled success in the past half-decade with their original series Sword Art Online. In 2009, the first SAO light novel about virtual reality video games with real-life implications was released. The novel has since been expanded to 15 volumes and has spawned two seasons worth of anime, three PlayStation games, a handful of mobile games and eight manga adaptations. The most recent manga book to arrive stateside is Sword Art Online: Girls’ Ops, and it’s just as fun and endearing as the original SAO. It’s definitely cuter, too.
In SAO:GO, series favorites Suguha, Rika and Keiko are coping pretty well with the aftermath of the Aincrad tragedy, and are still just as hopelessly addicted to online gaming as ever. The trio play the new VRMMO Alfheim Online religiously, and are ecstatic to find a new add-on quest has arrived after a long day at the SAO returnees school. Dubbed “the Angel’s Whisper Rings,” the adventure has the young ladies aiding an angel in strife while proving their devotion to one another to earn powerful rings of friendship.
The three dive into Alfeim Online ready to take on the new high-level quest as their avatars Leafa, Silica and Lisbeth, using their previous experience with the angel in SAO as a starting point. On their way to find her, the trio encounters a familiar dual-wielding swordsman clad in a midnight-black coat. Fans of the series will know it’s fate that unites the girls with this swordsman, but will never foresee the impending twist that makes SAO:GO an enjoyable departure from the previous SAO adventures.
SAO:GO is a quirky, adorable spinoff of the Japanese megahit Sword Art Online. Readers who have enjoyed SAO arcs Aincrad, Fairy Dance and Progressive will find so much to love about Girls’ Ops. Gamers and anime fans alike should also check this out.
What would have happened if novelist Henry James had met detective Sherlock Holmes? Granted, Holmes is a fictional character, but in The Fifth Heart by Dan Simmons, the premise of this unlikely meeting is central to the story. Simmons, who is known primarily for sci-fi, fantasy and horror, combines elements of these genres in this narrative with historical events interwoven into his fictitious plot.
The story opens with Holmes saving James’ life by preventing him from jumping into the Seine one night. From that point on, the pair form an odd partnership that is at times akin to that of Holmes and Watson. However, James never fully believes that Holmes is really who he claims to be. Is this man who sometimes goes by the name of Jan Sigerson really THE Sherlock Holmes or is it all an elaborate ruse? What about the supposed suicide of James’ friend Clover Adams? Will Holmes be able to unravel the connection between Clover and the mysterious Irene Adler? For those familiar with the stories by Arthur Conan Doyle, there are references galore to many of the characters and plots of these detective tales.
In addition to Henry James, there are other historical figures making appearances including Samuel Clemens, Theodore Roosevelt, Henry Adams and Vice President Adlai Stevenson, to name a few. Simmons enjoys going into great detail about various events (e.g. the crushing of someone’s skull or James’ criticism of Doyle’s stories) which can either add to or sideline the central mystery of the story. For those who either enjoy a complicated mystery full of plot twists or the idea of famous historical figures interacting with famous fictitious ones, The Fifth Heart definitely has plenty of both to offer.
Who recognizes this story? A young orphan lives with relatives who make her feel like a burden. To escape, she takes a job as a nanny to a little girl and falls in love with the child’s father. She flees that relationship to find herself in a second romantic entanglement but can’t forget about her first love. Yes, debut author Patricia Park freely admits that Re Jane was inspired by the Jane Eyre, but Park’s version is freshly minted and modern and anything but redundant.
Park’s Jane has a Korean mother and an American father, both of whom died when Jane was an infant. Jane has been raised in America by her traditional Korean uncle and his family, and works in his grocery in Queens. After a promising job offer in the financial sector falls through, Jane starts working as a live-in sitter for Devon, the adopted Chinese daughter of Beth and Bill Farley-Mazer. Gentrified Mazer family life opens a sophisticated new world for Jane, far from her familiar working class neighborhood of immigrants, and passion blooms between Jane and Bill. Just like the original heroine, Jane Re takes a trip to relieve her tap-tap-hai (an overwhelming discomfort), but her journey takes her to Korea to reconnect with extended family and explore her roots.
Park says the title Re Jane refers not only to her readaptation of the Bronte classic, but to Jane’s mixed heritage; Re is an Americanized version of the common Korean surname Ee, often pronounced in the United States as Lee. The cultural concept of nunchi, which Park describes as an expected social conduct combining anticipation and foresight, influences Jane as she struggles to find her footing as a Korean, an American, an adult and a woman. Sharply observant as well as endearing, readers will be pleased with this contemporary Jane.
Retired New York City police officer Steve Osborne has a swell of stories to tell, and his debut The Job: True Tales from the Life of a New York City Cop collects his written and oral tales featured in the popular NPR live program “The Moth.” After standing in at a show that was missing an act, Osborne’s penchant for chronicling his adventures on the beat in New York City’s ninth precinct landed him a nationwide storytelling tour and convinced him to keep writing in his spare time.
The Job contains heartfelt, easy-to-read stories with a great balance of action, humor and drama. In “Hot Dog,” Osborne recalls running into a repeat drug offender a few years after the man was released from Riker’s Island. “Midnights” details some of the worst possible calls a cop working the graveyard shift could receive — all of which flood Osborne’s precinct in one night. A woman reports a rape case and Osborne’s unit confronts the oddball assailant before he skips town in “Stockbroker.” Osborne reflects on the first time he had to face a mother and inform her of the death of her child in “Growing Pains.”
After taking in the stories collected in The Job, readers will get a great sense of the kind of cop Osborne was and the kind of guy he is now. His no-nonsense sincerity shines throughout his recollections, and he never shies away from portraying himself, his police allies or their suspects honestly. Osborne’s world views have been shaped by the survival tactics he had to employ every shift he worked, and the stories he shares are evident of the toll he has paid.
John Sununu, former Chief of Staff in the first Bush Administration, offers an inside portrait of the one-term presidency in The Quiet Man: The Indispensable Presidency of George H. W. Bush. The 41st president is most remembered for the First Gulf War, fought to liberate Kuwait after it was invaded by Iraq. It was one of the largest and most successful military campaigns in history. However, we seldom consider Bush’s domestic accomplishments in the face of an overwhelming opposition majority.
Sununu argues that Bush was also an effective engineer of domestic legislation. His legislative accomplishments included bolstering civil rights, creating the Americans with Disabilities Act and passing comprehensive clean air and water protections after they languished for 12 years in Congress. He identified the savings and loan crisis as a major threat to a healthy economy, overhauling the banking system and paving the way for the strong economic recovery of the 1990s.
With rare exceptions, don’t look for honest criticism in this work. It is clearly both a vigorous defense of the first Bush Administration and a homage to the man who held the office. It's still a fascinating behind-the-scenes view of the inner workings of the White House as it negotiates the tumultuous events at the end of the 20th century. We have a front-row seat to diplomatic machinations both domestic and foreign. Sununu observes that the consequences of 41’s presidency reverberate today like the "Thousand Points of Light" he lit across the nation.
Agree or disagree with his policies, this President Bush is aptly quoted, “I am a quiet man. But I hear the quiet people others don’t.”
Sylvie and Cassandra graduate from the palace of privilege known as Bennington College in 2003 and set out to make their marks on the world in Bennington Girls are Easy by Charlotte Silver. Bennington is a unique institution, rumored to have been founded in 1932 as an option for wayward daughters of prosperous families. Free thinking is encouraged and, while the students — which now includes boys — aren’t all heirs to pastry fortunes and diamond mines, each embraces an attitude of entitlement. But these graduates soon discover that this magnified sense of self-worth is often at odds with the workings of the real world.
Sylvie heads to New York first with Cassandra visiting frequently before settling there permanently after her romantic sure-thing falls apart. The two are convinced that their friendship will last through anything and they'll enjoy their 20s in New York, exploring the city and their sexuality all while trying to figure out what to do with their lives. Each is flawed in her own way, but Sylvie is incapable of recognizing her defects. Cassandra grows increasingly tired of Sylvie using her for her money, and the friction between these besties intensifies.
This coming-of-age novel is an honest look at two young, immature and flawed women struggling to find themselves in their post-college years. A revolving cast of quirky characters, many of whom are friends from Bennington, provide added insight into the rarefied world Cassandra and Sylvie inhabit — a world of art, money and sex. While often unlikeable, the characters are intriguing, and the depiction of life after college is authentic. Silver, a Bennington grad herself, infuses an irreverent humor throughout the novel which balances the deeper messages of failed friendship and emotional maturation.
John David Anderson's The Dungeoneers is the story of Colm, a young boy trying to help his family. Unfortunately for Colm, he's a thief. Fortunately for Colm, he's given the chance at riches beyond his wildest dreams. All he has to do is join Thwodin's Legion, the world's premier dungeon raiding guild. Oh, and he has to survive those same dungeons, full of deadly traps, murderous monsters and, of course, a couple hundred other adventurers in training, starting with his own team. Lena is a fighter hoping to become a barbarian, with a phobia of seeing her own blood. Quinn is a mage with a speech impediment under stress and a bottomless pit for a stomach. Selene wants to make friends with all the creatures they meet in the world's most dangerous places, as long as they aren't any bigger than spiders.
Thwodin's Legion is basically Hogwarts for the kids growing up with World of Warcraft and Minecraft. Everyone fits into a fantasy archetype, from the wizards to the rogues, and while they may not move far from their base, these archetypes are classic for a lot of reasons. Everyone gets roles for their place in a dungeon raid. “Stay behind the big one.” “Don't steal from your partners, unless it's okay.” “Never let the big guy do the sneaking.”
Anderson is a master of throwing kids into situations that are so vividly detailed that they feel believable but utterly fantastic at the same time. He has also turned out the superb Sidekicked and Minion, books about kids who grow up in the battle between superheroes and supervillains. No matter how out there the world, it's grounded in day-to-day life. Colm steals because his family is poor. His family doesn't accept this because they are moral people. This book is about how a thief becomes more than just a thief, and figures out how to do the sort of right thing in a complicated world.
Make Something Up: Stories You Can't Unread collects shock-fiction author Chuck Palahniuk’s stories written from the conception of his first book Fight Club up through his latest novel Beautiful You. With a sequel to Fight Club making its run as a monthly comic book right now, it’s the perfect time for these stories to bubble to the surface and explode in a mess of bilious, sticky grossness that you will never be able to bleach from your conscience.
Palahniuk claims to have lost count after making over 200 audience members faint during live readings of his story “Guts,” and the tales in Make Something Up have been let from the same vein. “The Toad Prince” deserves immediate mention — a young man becomes fascinated with STDs so he decides to collect them by tracking down prostitutes and swabbing their unmentionables. He cultures the samples in petri dishes in his room, and what he does with those samples... let’s just say the growth is unexpectedly potent. There’s a trio of stories in which personified animals work menial jobs and disappoint their lovers while their offspring huff glue on recess playgrounds; Aesop would weep. A pony-loving farm girl tricks her father into purchasing a horse she and her friends found in a viral video in “Red Sultan’s Big Boy.” Fight Club hero Tyler Durden turns up in “Expedition” to shepherd a man in denial down the dark path through his subconscious to a place we do not talk about.
The longer stories in Make Something Up feel like condensed versions of Palanhiuk’s earlier novels, with unforgettable plots and enough gory detail to turn you shades of green. Reading his shorter stories is like taking a rib-breaking Epinephrine shot straight to the heart and feeling the surge race through your veins to your vital organs, working them double-time. Readers who have enjoyed any of Palanhiuk’s books should definitely check out Make Something Up.
The days of summer are dwindling down, and all of the blockbuster movies we were waiting to see have long been released. What’s a cinephile to do when there’s not much left worth seeing in the month of August? Here are three entertaining novels that fall into typical movie genres to help you get through the rest of summer.
Looking for an edgy intergenerational dramedy? Pick up Mat Johnson’s Loving Day. Warren Duffy has returned to the Philadelphia ghetto to claim the dilapidated roofless “mansion” left to him by his recently deceased Irish American father, his black mother having died years before. Warren’s life can’t possibly get any worse, or so he thinks. He’s a not very good, not very successful comic book artist. He identifies as a black man although he’s so light complexioned he consciously overcompensates in an attempt to fit in. His marriage is over and the comic book shop his wife bankrolled for him has gone belly-up. He owes her some serious money and his only hopes of making some quick cash is drawing for hire at a comic book convention. Imagine Warren’s surprise when one of the convention attendees turns out to be the teenage daughter he never knew he had. Tal is more than surprised to learn about her racial identity, having been raised by her Jewish grandfather. She chalks up her hair and features to imagined Israeli roots. Johnson’s down-and-out protagonist retains his ironic sense of humor as he is forced to man up and become a father while exploring his own racial identity and helping his daughter to do the same. Potential love interests for both father and daughter make things interesting, especially since they stem from a special charter school at The Mélange Center, dedicated to helping biracial persons “find the sacred balance” between their black and white perspectives. Broadly comic and insightful as it comments on race issues today, Loving Day explores the dynamics of relationships of all kinds.
If suspenseful thrillers are your thing, look no further Michael Koryta’s latest. Last Words follows Florida investigator Mark Novak, a man whose wife and colleague at their pro bono legal firm is killed under mysterious circumstances. A year and a half later, a distracted and still distraught Novak is sent by his boss to a snow-covered Indiana small town to look into the unsolved murder of a 17-year-old girl, Sarah Martin. Although the case has been cold for nearly 10 years, it’s still very much on the minds of the residents of Garrison. It seems the main suspect, the eccentric outcast Ridley Barnes, wrote the firm to specifically request Novak’s services. Barnes raison d’etre is the continued exploration of the supercave beneath the town, a cave he believes is almost a living being. Barnes was the one who emerged from that cave with Sara Martin’s body after a search team failed to locate her. But Novak soon finds out that the caver isn’t the only potential suspect, and that the citizens of Garrison are not very happy to see the case revisited. Novak makes a crucial mistake heading into the case — he fails to do any research before he arrives, a decision he regrets almost immediately. Tightly plotted with interesting, well-developed characters and plenty of suspenseful action, both in the past and present, Last Words would make an excellent screen adaptation. Koryta has chosen an interesting backdrop for the potential crime, and he uses the cave and the exploration of its dark, cold, claustrophobic, labyrinthine network to suspenseful potential.
For the thrill of a satisfying psychological horror film, it’s hard to top Paul Tremblay’s A Head Full of Ghosts. As the book begins, 20-something Merry is returning to her family’s former Massachusetts home (now fallen to ruin and up for sale) to meet with a bestselling author. Merry has a fascinating story to tell, one that continues to permeate all aspects of her life. Fifteen years earlier, the Barretts were struggling. Their father had been out of work for some time, and they were in danger of losing their house. Teen Marjorie had begun acting strangely. The stories she has always told 8-year-old Merry have taken on a sinister tone, and she delights in upsetting her. Strange things start to happen. Is it mental illness or something supernatural? While their stressed mother takes Marjorie to a therapist, their father opts for visits with a Catholic priest with ties to the media. Soon, the cash-strapped Barretts foolishly agree to allow their situation to become a reality television show, The Possession, as a way to pay the mortgage. Tremblay builds suspense and tension by telling the story through present day Merry, 8-year-old Merry and a snarky horror blogger named Karen who is deconstructing The Possession 15 years later. A Head Full of Ghosts is funny, clever and thoroughly chilling. Tremblay brings in plot elements from many famous horror movies, even as he pays homage to Charlotte Perkins Gilman’s famous short story of madness “The Yellow Wallpaper” and Shirley Jackson’s classic gothic chiller We Have Always Lived in the Castle. Could Marjorie have been faking the whole thing, or was she possessed a la The Exorcist?